This is a picture of our Bank manager, Mr Tim Hastie, of HSBC. We have banked with this company and its predecessor, Midland Bank, for nearly 60 years. We lend the Bank substantial sums of money which it uses to fund its core activities, including carefully chosen and monitored investments.

Every few weeks, we receive an email from Mr Hastie, enjoining us to take advantage of the Bank's financial advice, honed up no doubt from their experience with the funds chosen by them and operated by Mr Bernie Madoff. The latest edition included some cutting edge stuff about trading with Argentina.

Mi Buenos Aires querido,
cuando yo te vuelva a ver
no habrá más pena ni olvido.

We wouldn't mind this, and have no objection to the familiar use of first names, but for some reason he is unable to spell them correctly despite their appearing on Bank Mandates, etc., and despite a number of requests, some of which have descended into sarcasm.

If you see this man, would you be kind enough to mention our difficulty, as we are unable it appears to communicate with him directly.